i don’t want to wear your tshirt to sleep today. i don’t want to wear the clothes i’m wearing right now. i want to jump in burning hot running water and scrub the humiliation, embarrassment and stupidity off myself.
i can only wonder WHY i sadomasochistically choose to stay in a relationship that is making me feel so bad about myself.
i don’t know how to deal with you when you get upset. i can’t, i can’t open my mouth and allow the smooth oily words you want to hear to pop out like giant regurgitated pills.
and when i stare at you miserably and try to make fumbling apologies that involve me verbally prostrating myself before you, and you continue to look stonily unmoved, i feel helpless with lack of knowledge on what to say or do.
and in that ocean of not knowing anything and fumbling around in the dark, i do know one thing. any longer, and i’m not going to take it. i do know, that if we continue like this, no, if you continue to be like this, get hung up on stupid unimportant things, and make me miserable and teary and get satisfaction out of my misery, i will end this.
these are not the foundations lasting relationships are made on.
make your choice.
happy pre-valentines week to you too.
3 comments:
That's telling em Sista!
You know the problem with men is that they don't GET things they way there women would like them to GET them.
And 'things' is not a metaphor for you know what.
I feel if only women could be less subtle, and men less stubborn... If only women would stop expecting hallelujah type divine connections and men would start paying a little more attention, relationships would actually work out.
Sadly, it takes men atleast one dumping to GET it.
With women, however, its slightly worse. If they're not born with this understanding, the never develop it.
Either way, its always best to try and sort things out without any expectations. When that fails, then is the time to abandon ship.
Best of Luck, NF. Can't be easy.
I must say, i find comfort in knowing that someone i respect will be sharing a pint of misery with me for VD.
But i do hope i get to drink it all alone and you find romance by the spade ful.
Happy VD therefore, in all reluctant sincerity.
everyone knows valentines day is an evil zionist conspiracy to enslave our minds, cause our souls everlasting torment and eat our hearts from within.
but then again, thats probably the dictionary definition of love. life sucks muchly.
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