but stiff upper lip jeeves, chop chop, tally ho lad, etc etc.

how can it have been a year? i still refer to her in present tense.

we've only been in this city for two waking hours and three of us have
fallen sick. I can feel my strep throat burn little holes in my
tonsils, and every time i close my eyes a wave of black dizziness
threatens to overwhelm.

i have a deadline on monday. i have stuff to do. lots of it. and so
many things to read. my mind feels like wool filled jelly, expanded to encapsulate so many horizons its difficult to concentrate on excel
files.

we landed and there was a little turbulence. A beautiful arc of fork
lightening connecting to the ground for one brilliant second to
welcome us as we stepped into the waiting car.

my little brother's "bachlor pad" is suddenly inundated with family.
i'm sharing his room, haha. he screams like a little girl every time
he finds some "revolting feminine looking thing" in his personal
space. haha.

my father and sister argue behind me somewhere, over which supara to read. the maulvi's and relatives drone together in monotonous voices in the next room.

tensions are high. we're all trying to avoid the emotional deluge. my father sits a little apart, battling hard, battling silently, and battling alone. like the rest of us. sitting like zombies in a very crowded house full of memories.

but stiff upper lip jeeves, chop chop, tally ho lad, etc etc.